Lessons in PR

So we got an email through from someone over at Frixo.com the other day asking whether or not we’d be interested in featuring their services on our website.

The lovely Charles, who messaged us, is clearly spamming people up in a terrible hash-job attempt at PR which unfortunately is only going to reflect terribly on what actually seems like a very legit and actually decent company. Of course, to teach Charles a bloody good lesson, I took it upon myself to query the potential business relationship between Bite the Belt and Frixo and, more importantly, highlight what an absolute massive penis he is.

Please enjoy our encounter below:

 Frixo Dickheads Email

Frixo Dickheads Response 01.

Frixo Dickheads Response 02.

Frixo Dickheads Response 03.

We are as of yet to receive a reply from Charles or anyone at Frixo and in that I hope that they have learned their lesson. Or they just think we’re really weird. But I’d like to think the latter and that Charles excitedly opened this email on the prospects of a potential sale, only to have his integrity and value as a person smashed to pieces, along with all of his hopes and dreams.

Let this be a lesson to all of you Round Robin emailers. All you Spam pumpers. You Copy & Paste jobs. You throw enough shit at the proverbial wall and something will stick cunts. It doesn’t work! It’s lazy as fucking shit and it immediately comes off as lazy as fucking shit and consequently makes whoever it is on the receiving line hate you and whatever it is you’re trying to push. Firstly for being such a slothernly wank stain and secondly for thinking that it’s absolutely fine. WHEN IT 100% ISN’T!! AT ALL!! EVER!!!

Now Charles here is not a worst case scenario. In actual fact he’s pretty high up on the rankings of “Well constructed email” just “Terribly obvious that he has no idea who he’s sending it out to”. I’ve seen far worse. So this goes for the people who should be emailing us, guys with some good music to promote; Do your research, know the company/blog/label you’re contacting, drop some info in the email that allows the reader to see that you know what you’re talking about. It’s not fucking rocket science but it’s sad to say that there really are people out there who need it to be spelled out for them (or though more than likely these people, who are clearly lacking in any intelligence whatsoever, are not going to be the people making the best music anyway so whatever) but you have to take into consideration that the people you are emailing receive bullshit emails promoting shit all fucking day long. And if yours is just a hurried waste of everyone’s time then no one is going to read it or give your “art” any notice whatsoever. Because they’ll just think you’re a douchebag with no marketing morals.

On a lighter note; Big ups to all aspiring producers and artists out there who really are working hard and pushing their material in a well thought out and loving approach, you’re the dreamers who deserve a shot in life and we here at BtB wish you all of the luck in the world…

Unless your music really is shit in which case you should definitely pack it in, get off JSA and stop wasting everyone’s time.

Safe.

Josh & the BtB crew.

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